A bad day

Today was a very bad day.  I lost my composure with my boys when they would not listen to me and they just laughed at me when I asked them to pick up their things.  They do not respect me or listen.  I ended up locking myself in my room and finally cried.  It felt good to release some of the emotions inside,  but now I just feel numb and like I am on the edge of a cliff.  I am not sure that my meds are working and I really need them to work right now.  I can't seem to see my way through this mess that I am in and it is upsetting my mom and worrying her.  I don't like to worry her,  but I don't know who else to turn to.