Wow, not doing well at all today, emotionally. Angry, scared, frustrated. I can't run due to an ankle injury that won't heal. I can't ride due to coumadin right now. I've got no physical outlet. The thought of being on thinners the rest of my life completely depresses me, and that's what I am looking at.
Then I see the pulmonologist a couple days ago and he starts throwing wround words like Cancer. Seems unprovoked and unexplained PEs can be caused by cancer, and now I have had two of them. he suggested another pelvic CT. I had one before in July after the first episode, but another one would be 5 CTs in one year. And he wants an endoscopy, and a colonoscopy. That's on top of the cystoscopy I had last year due to urinating blood. Guess they don't want to leave out any orifices. But now I am just obsessing about cancer. I've been thru so much the last year, I honestly don't think I could handle a cancer diagnosis. that would likely put me right over the edge.
I just feel like I want to scream and rip my skin off right now. And no one really understands what it's like
Then I see the pulmonologist a couple days ago and he starts throwing wround words like Cancer. Seems unprovoked and unexplained PEs can be caused by cancer, and now I have had two of them. he suggested another pelvic CT. I had one before in July after the first episode, but another one would be 5 CTs in one year. And he wants an endoscopy, and a colonoscopy. That's on top of the cystoscopy I had last year due to urinating blood. Guess they don't want to leave out any orifices. But now I am just obsessing about cancer. I've been thru so much the last year, I honestly don't think I could handle a cancer diagnosis. that would likely put me right over the edge.
I just feel like I want to scream and rip my skin off right now. And no one really understands what it's like
Replies
CJ, I\'m 55 and also a bike racer and triathlete. I\'m about 10 days into this and feeling your pain. So what\'s this shit about not riding while taking cumadin?? I had been experiencing pain and discomfort in my right leg for a couple of years, a condition I attributed to the ergonomics of being a bus driver. Then last week my leg got really swollen and I was unable to walk. I got a quick diagnosis of DVT and went on lovanox and warfarin that day. Yesterday I had an ultrasound that confirmed the sorry diagnosis. My DVT stretches from behind my knee to just below my mid-calf, about 10\". 8 days into blood thinners now and my INR hasn\'t budged. I\'m sitting with my leg up, looking at the fresh Spring snow of western Colorado and wanting to go for a run on my snowshoes. I can barely walk to the car. I\'ve never had a PE, but if I get one I hope it kills me. I have no desire to live like this. I was planning a solo assault on the White Rim in a day this Spring, a half marathon this Fall, century road rides, etc. If the pain ever allows me back on the bike I\'m gonna be ridin\' it dude. SO WHAT\'S THIS SHIT ABOUT NOT RIDING WHILE ON WARFARIN?? You can\'t be serious. If I crash and bleed out so be it. There aren\'t enough AD drugs or arrogant condesending doctors in the universe to change my mind or give me a good attitude about this. You in Colorado?
Ken
It sucks. I get to see a breast surgeon this week about a lump. My first response was you\'ve gotta be kidding me. I just got used to the whole dvt/pe/coumadin thing. Hopefully we\'ll both be cleared. Keep us posted.
cj - my heart goes out to you.
cj - my heart goes out to you.