What next...

Well, very soon we'll find out if my husband, my handsome sailor man, made 1st Class or not...and if not, it's back to panic time for me.  He has only a few more chances to make it before he's forced out of the Navy, 6 years shy of retirement due to his high tenure of 14 years.  I try so hard to not think about it because God knows we've been thru worse and we always come out near the top but this time, well this time would be different.  For the past nearly four years since my diagnosis we've relied on our wonderful health insurance to ensure that I have all of my necessary appointments, test and medications.  If he's out of the Navy, well, I don't really know what will happen.  There is always Medicare but the more I read about it the more depressing it is, not to mention what it will cost.  Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for whatever I can get and I know that many people go thru their illnesses without benefit of insurance.  To me, it's very disturbing and causes me so much stress that I'm feeling anxious every second of the day and at certain times, my hair even falls out.  Maybe part of it is just me, overreacting but then again, I think in some ways I have reason to worry.  I guess I'll have to try to just take one day at a time but that's not my nature. I'm a planner, but how can I plan for what I don't know is going to happen?