I can say that if one thing goes wrong your whole day is shot. Wll its try. Today my ex served me with protection papers again and the sheirffs department is going crazy because he is doing this. He's been trying to make me look bad but thiere is nothing that he can do bacause of his histoy background. Once again he's telling me to stay away from him like I want to be around him. AllI cant is my son to be with me and enjoy life. He has denied all supervision with my son. Because he's an A**hole and thats what the deputy's said also.  He's bring things up in the past that isn't going to mattermuch because with the threats that he sent me before I had the child and I took care of him more than he did. I just want my life to be back to normal again. With him out is been okay. Its hard for me to type up an answer for the protection orders because I can't quite comperhand it so I'm asked my lawyer advisor to do it. Being problems typing up court papers is hard for me as it is.  So hopefully and go back to court on Thursday. All he is dong iscausing emotional stress on me and my children. Been busy working which helps some and bowling and also seeing a wonderful person who is helping me get through this. I know that your there just haven't came on.  When I go out which feels like a whole different world because I wasnt able to do that in a long time that Im afraid on what to do. Its hard for me to make a decession and I want this to be fun. Hopefully that I can break away from this shyness of making up my mind on what I want to do. I am a funny person but finding something to do is hard. Then I found out today that my grandmother is in the hospital after having a 3rd stroke in a week. So its day by day and just waiting. I am just afraid that I may not be able to aford the travel cost going back to Wiscousin. I"m the oldest grandchild out of 14 so its hard to deal with that.  I hope that things will get better soon this is the time that I need a real mircle to come true. I miss you all and pray from me. Talk to you all soon.