Been 3 weeks since I have't seen my youngest son and its killing me more and more. My other two children is taking it very hard that there baby brother isn't here with them. When I called a lawyer on it he told me that he is just sick for doing this. He doesn't it doesn't matter on what I did to him but no child should be away from him mother at all. My life has been so much better with my ex in it. Thank god. I'm starting to really now what my life is suppose to be like. I guess you can say that its been a rough road and trying to find the end of it. I hope that there is an end. He tells me that I need counseling but he made me agree to that but after not being around him I don't. He was the controling one and not me. Everyone needs space at times and do things that they are about. Not with him. Its hard to figure out on what I want to do while my kids are not with me. The are gone away about 2-3 nights away and during that time I guess that I"m afraid to do anything. All I got use to was bowling then coming home and maybe be able to play pool. But now since he's not a part of my life its hard to figure that part out. I now that there is so much to do out there but being trapped like this for the last couple of years just took everything away from you. I have met a special person but its hard to make up my mind on what to do. I know that there is things that I would like to do but just afraid to do them. I would won't mind just going to a part and walk around a lake or just sittig somewhere in peace and talk about everything. I know that I care on the things that I do but its been a rough road and I don't want to make the same mistake again. Even if its just watching a movie or doing something is fine with me. I'm not much of a picky person when it comes to things to do. I just want to be able to say it. I just hope that everything will go well and be able to have my son again. its just driving me crazy and with him threatening me with protection papers again I can't take this. My ex is just tearing me up and also my parents. Everytime my other two children come home they want to see there little brother and I don't like to see them this way. They care about him so much that they hurt. My ex never cares about anything else but him and now with it going on 3 weeks its killing me so bad that there i day I can't sleep or don't want to do to work. Please got let this be over... I want to be happy with all my children together again and be able to make decissions in my life and be the right ones.