i don't know how much i can handle living with all this pain, but yet i have to be there for two kids, me and my parents have custody of them. they mean everything to me but i don't want them to see me when i am feeling this bad, i don't know wheather going into the hospital would help. i need to get better, they need alot of attention they have been abused there whole lifes. well i have to go to work i will write more later.