i went to my grandma's funeral and they ended up showing her for the entire time, i was very upset seeing her. after i got done i went on my little vacation and i was not able to enjoy myself, i had to much on my mind, i have been having alot of panic attacks latley, i did get to talk with my counselor today, it went really good, the only thing is she is really worried about me. i don't know what to do anymore, i am really depressed, i feel better when i see her and then when i leave i get depressed again, does anybody else feel like i do. please i need some advise
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I know just how you feel. I always used to live for visits to my doctor or counsellors. The days in between were awful and I didn\'t know how I would cope. I became very dependent on the people who were helping me. It took a lot of time but I did get past this. My heart aches for you Molly, because in reading of you pain it brings back the feelings of pain I used to have. I too lost my most beloved grandmother and it took a long time to be able to cope with that. All I can say at this point is to hang in there. Be patient with yourself and don\'t expect too much too soon. Do things that lift your spirits, such as listening to music that inspires you. Try not to isolate yourself from others too much because that will make things worse. Work with you counsellor and believe in yourself. Believe that you can get better. I know this is all hollow sounding advice when you are in the depths of depression and despair, but it is going to take time to turn things around and the challenge for you will be to exist while this is happening. If you can go for long walks as this will release seratonin in your brain and give you a better feeling. But above all else, just hang on. It will not be easy but you are not alone. The DS community is here for you. Just hold on to that. You can talk whenever you need to.