Missing you

Lonely mornings lead to long days, the hours like demons, taunting me, laughing at me.  I search for purpose and I find it in the small things.  For right now, the big picture is painted with yearning and wishfulness.  I am lucky, yet I feel cursed for I lived so long with bright eyes and special kisses, I know not how to live without them.  For, if you have basked in the sun, how can you suddenly live without it?  If you have tasted wine, then mere water is a bitter potion.  For this is how I feel today, a man deprived of his paradise, and not knowing just how I lost it nor where, I will find it again I close my eyes and I am there again, music, laughter, touches.  I am there being embraced by an angel, a lover, a companion and remember.  I remember and I am happy.  Then my eyes open, and once again, a stark black and white world. Life is wonderful, but it still yearns for the times when she looked at me and I could see the world in those eyes, yet I saw nothing but her.  And that was all I needed.