Today, many of us attend our first holiday without our ex or STBX  For me, this is the first one in 33 years she was not a big part of my life, standing right there.  She was a great cook, and after a while you fit to each other cuisine wise.  I miss some of her cooking but one thing I learned is that sometimes, a food dislike is not because you do not like something, it is because you do not the WAY SHE FIXES IT!  LOL All these years I thought I hated sweet potatoes, but I LOVE EM!  I just hated the way SHE fixed em!      Today is also a gift, for today, I start a new tradition with a new person, in a new town, and with a life almost totally changed from my old one.  Sometimes, rebirth can be intensely painful, but the world bursts upon us without mercy and then we are suddenly in it, dazzled by the light and sounds, sometimes disturbed by them.  The kind of rebirth that divorce inflicts on us can tear us apart while putting us back together.  I yearn sometimes for kisses that do not come, traditions that will no longer be a part of my life and I know that I can march on, accepting the fact that God is not going to change what happened.  So today, I embrace that which I have, and start a new Thanksgiving tradition, far from my old home and my old life and I know, that for me, I am blessed beyond compare.      Last night, I dreamed God sent me a letter and here is what it said:   "My son, I know that you hurt but do not be angry with me, I want the best for you.  Your ex chose her path and  I will not change her heart nor will I reach into her mind and deny her the path she has sought.       If I will not deny her the right to choose heaven or hell, sin or salvation, eternal life or eternal death, why would you think I would take away her choice to choose to divorce you or the choice to have a new life and be with another?  Embrace this new life I have given you, and know I am walking by your side every moment of  it.  I hurt with you, and I feel your pain, but I cannot break a promise that I made to the world, and that is the promise that I will grant each one of you the right to choose your own path.  I do not like your divorce, but understand that I do not blame you for it.  I love you, and just ask me, I and will hold you up till you gather the strength to walk on your own.  Ask me, and I will help you move on.  I will be here, when you flail about in pain  I will be here  when you curse me in anger for putting you through this.  I will be here, when you need someone hold you tight against their breast as your sobs of sorrow wrack your body.  I will carry you when it seems no one else will.  I will be here my child, and know that your Father loves you with all his heart.  Let that love fill you, keep me in your heart for I have given you a great gift and a new chance to make your life how YOU see fit.  And trust that I want the very best for you.  With Eternal Love, God."      To all those I care about realize that God is NOT gonna make your ex come back.  God will not intervene in this.  Don't you see?  If He did that, He would be denying them a very basic promise He made to all of us!  He promised us the free will to choose our own path, good or bad.  I see some of you hanging on, standing alone, praying that God will change you and your ex so that you can re-unite.    But that is one gift He will never give us. Come! Let us join God and walk hand in hand.  Come! Let us join each other, and in that gathering get the strength to move forward.  Come! Let us embrace this new gift, this new life and I promise you, if you want, I will be right there with you.  And to the special woman:  I know that sometimes you hurt, that the struggle gets to be such a heavy weight that you feel as if any moment, you will collapse.  But have hope!  There is one out here who hurts with you.  There is someone in the world who desires to help you carry your burden.  He will hold you at night when you cry.  He will  kiss your cheeks and look at you with love clouded eyes, and because of that find such beauty in your face, it almost makes him cry.  Know that he yearns for nothing more complex than the soft touch of your hand as it caresses his face, a soft kiss and a loving whisper.  And in that moment of tenderness, know that you will be cherished, that you are THE great gift he has wanted and needed.  For I care about you and want to love, comfort, give happiness to you.  When the time is right, perhaps I will be in your life full time, 24 hours a day.  The path is long and hard and there is so much in the way that might prevent that from happening.   But you and I want the same things.   And He will help us find our way together if that is what we both want and need. Larry