My holidays end soon so I've been in a flurry of activity to accomplish some home projects and get some late summer bbq visits in with friends and family.  Time is flying by.  I have a bumper crop of tomotoes, peppers and corn.  I still haven't found the time or desire to do any canning this year.  Last summer I canned 24 jars of tomatoes and it was wonderful to pull one out in the winter to make a soup or a sauce.   I will also have a ton of squash come September.  It was the only thing outside my little garden fence to survive the critters.  The chipmunks kept digging up my sunflower seeds and eating them.  Rabbits or something else kept biting off my pumpkins, watermelons and cucumbers as soon as they emerged from the soil.My sweet little girl took a face plant on the concrete last week.  She didn't have time to put out her hands so she took full whack right on the mouth and nose.  Fortunately she will not lose her front teeth although one may discolour.  I know they are baby teeth so I'm trying not to worry too much.  I relate this little incident in my journal because the whole incident scared me more than I think "normal" people... that is people who haven't lost children to miscarriage.   She is so precious to me I have to fight a tendency to be over protective.  I know I would not be able to survive if I ever lost her.  I treasure every moment with her.  We are dealing with the bittersweet feelings that come with her starting school this fall.I feel my body is finally getting back to normal.  Sometimes I feel rather angry at how long it went on unnecessarily.  I still haven't called the doctor to find out if the exploratory yielded any results.  I suppose if it did she would have had me in sooner.  On the other hand, maybe it did but since she doesn't want me trying for two months, she's not going to do anything about it at this point.   I did get my referral appointment with the other specialist.  It's not until October 29.  So again precious time goes by.  My husband and I need to do some serious talking because this route if I pursue it will be a difficult one.  I will have to travel over 200 km to see this doctor and he charges fees.  Up until now, we've been under our health care system and other than driving haven't had to pay out of pocket.  So the first visit is $390.00.   We're on a budget.   We just borrowed $ to replace our roof.   I don't know...... sometimes I feel like each roadblock I encounter is a sign to stop trying but I'm too stupid or stubborn to pay attention to them.