9 days and counting...

9 days and counting...no urges to go online.  I have tried to remain abstinent for as much as possible.  I've been in a marriage that has been celibate for the last 8 months due to her medical problems.  This is difficult because my only outlet to this point is self pleasuring.  I tried to quit that as well as of last week.  I have had less success with that.  Twice last week, but down from twice a day.  I guess that's progress, but still not what I'm looking for.  I really need to do better with that.  I hope that my wife notices that I am clean and checks up on me.  I know it is not usually the wisest thing to have your spouse checking up on you, but she's way smarter on technology than I am, and I need to rebuild the trust that I destroyed in our relationship.  So I need for her to check up on me to see if I am being honest.