Goodness, I was angry about my life before this happened, this makes things worse. I know that I will find some happiness someday, just not yet. It is not like me to be angry. I have always been a very hard worker for little reward because I think that is what makes the world go round. I have selflessly given of myself for many years, and this happens to me. This might be the universes way of telling me to slow down. I have done so many different things and maybe now I have the opourtunity to apply them. I have been the butcher, the baker, and the candlestick maker. I have had jobs were they want you to work as fast as possible, I am sick of that. Not to long ago, I had a job at a parking garage as a valet parker. I would go to get one car and people would ask me to get theirs also. I would say, "yah, let me move that with my mind". It is from that experience that I learned one at a time. Multitasking is sloppy, nobody remembers to do everything. That is how I rebuilt my engine, one at a time. You can't put on the air cleaner until you put on the carb., etc.. I need to tell myself, just relax.