9/11/10 26 days smoke free

I am having a MAJOR anxiety attack about going back to work tomorrow!!!! I got on my knees and prayed to ask God for his guidance in going back..I don't know whats going on with me?? First of all I have never been smoke free as a flight attendant ever in my entire airline history!!!!! My job is sooooo stressful and smoking helped me get through for many years. I honestly wish that I didn't ever have to ever go back because I honestly don't like being a flight attendant anymore. I used to when I drank and smoked but I know it sounds weird but I really need Gods guidance on what work is best for me. I know right now is a terrible time to leave a job, I have been with this airline since 1997. I really don't like to fly anymore, it makes me sad because I used to enjoy it. I wish I could stay off work forever.... Boy, I never thought I would have all this anxiety, I have never had it all before, but I am scared... i'm trying not to think too much into it !!! I have been sooo tempted tonight to smoke cause I am nervous.. I wish I didn't need this job. I have been feeling this way a long time but now with quiting smoking my true feelings are coming out more than ever!!!
Maybe I can make some goals, to try to figure out what direction regarding my job, I could go into. I have been thinking about this for ages. I really have trouble figuring out what I am good at and won't get bored of easily. There are some good things about working for the airlines you can have a lot of days off and have a flexible schedule. Not many jobs are that flexible!! Thats why I have hung in there all these years. They work with me if I need time off for my depression and anxiety issues.  I work with different people all the time which can be good. I have been burned out for soooo long. It makes me feel sick thinking about it.
 

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

i\'m a f/a too. it will be alright....though i know the anxiety in which you speak.
CarlaBent
CarlaBent

I hope it turns out to be less stressful than it feels like it\'s going to be right now. Extreme anxiety sucks big time. Best of luck to you!!!! ((((((Hugs)))))
deleted_user
deleted_user

You do need to turn to God now when the stress hits - but that is the real source of comfort - the others were just lies to keep you in bondage. You are on the right path, but remember, it is one step at a time, one day at a time. But you already knew that!