How am I able to get through this while showing my son life isnt all fun and games and everyone isn't going to be ok with just brushing it off the shoulder. I don't want to hug it out like it's just another day. I don't want to be touched or hugged by own son. And the thing is i can't explain to him why because he won't listen or want to understand why I feel like I do. Just that I'm suppose to say "I love you", " I miss you", "I'll see you later", and give plenty of hugs and kisses and act like everything is hunky-dory. Well, sorry, not going to happen. Since me telling you things never worked, I guess me not being close as your mother will get it across the unfortunate way. I will always love my son, I just won't be able to trust you again.