First entry

New here, depressed for some time and been off meds several years.  Now having to go back on them.  Not happy about that.  This is my decision but I feel it's the best for me at this time.  My RSD flares have gotten to much to handle, pain elevates and I can't take pain meds due to Gi issues.  I have them but refuse to take them unless absolutely necessary.  Dystonia seems under control.  PARKINSONS is stable.  Ra meds help my hands but not my feet.  They gave me my ketamine cream back so that helps when I remember to use it.  I have pulmonary hypertension which gsve my right side heart damage due to sjorgens So I guess they would say it's secondary.  Basically it's hypertension from lung pressure to much going into heart.  At least that's the way it was explained to me.  I always forget to use my inhaler that was recently given to me.  I hate my nebulizers so rarely take them.  These aren't as needed, but multiple times a day.  Ugg.  Been overly stressed and this week for once I have no appointments to go to.  I'm stuck in this room. in my hospital bed, with No where to go and no one to see as I have no home help till the agency finds me a new person.  This sucks.  I need someone here.  I can't get out of bed myself,  I might as well be paralyzed.  The pain does that sometimes .  It's no wonder they can RSD the suicide disease.  I wouldn't but am helping s friend who's there and she's newly dx.  I feel for her.  My heart breaks for her. if only I could do more.