Thoughts

As I think back on my life, I would have never thought that I would be where I am right now.  I really thought that I would have either been remarried or definitely have some permanent in my life.  So I find myself here.....not really with anyone.  Is this God's plan for me?  Is this where I am suppose to be for now?  I have so many questions.  I'm angry; I'm sad; I'm frustrated...all of the above.  I am so thankful for my health of course; thankful for my kids and what they have become but yet I still "struggle".  I struggle always financially...can never seem to get behind the 8 ball; I struggle with friends and those who can't seem to commit to wanting to get together...definitely not like the Sex and the City girls!  HA.....I want this year to be my best ever...I turn 50!  WOW...I don't feel it.  I don't want to be sad anymore; I don't want to be angry anymore and I want to forgive, forget and move forward.  I'm so trying.......