Tired
I never knew it was possible to be this incredibly tired. I'm tired all the time. Getting thru the day is all I can do. Last night I was so exhausted.. I didn't have the energy to pickup the remote and turn on the TV. I ordered some new movies for myself to try and give me something to do to keep my mind off stuff..and I'm too tired to watch them. I want to go get my hair done...but by the time I make it thru a work day...the thought of going to the salon is overwhelming. My friends are worried about me...I miss them but I don't have the energy to even talk on the phone..because people want explanations I can't give.This nightmare is just beginning. How am I going to get thru this?
Replies
This is normal the first phase of it. You have went through an emotional rollercoaster. You life has been ripped apart, as you knew it. You still have no answers what will happen with him and his court dates, and ultimately if and how long he will be in prison. So of course you are exhausted. Go with it. Rest a lot. Sleeping also gives your mind a rest.
You are now dealing with so many things alone. That is new to you, I am sure. You will worry about him, think the worst things could happen to him in there, when actually the worst usually is they are bored all day, every day and yea, they worry about us too.
As long as you are still able to function enough to get to work, and not let that part of your life fall apart, that\'s ok. Give yourself time.
I frankly didn\'t want to talk to anyone either. I got sick of their nosiness, and their opinions, and sure didn\'t want to listen to their advice. Advice from people not going through this is stupid. They don\'t have a clue.
Your friends will have to just deal with you not talking to them until you are ready to, and if they start hammering on you about leaving him, saying bad things, then don\'t talk to them. Who needs it. It won\'t make you stop loving him.
I found sleeping to be my escape too. When sleeping, my world was ok for those few hours. Just take it slow. Do only what you feel like you want or need to do.
If it lasts more than a few months, THEN go to the doctor. But for now, just breathe, take time to be tired, and rest up.
I think you will feel better after you have all the answers. If it goes bad, you will be upset again, but you will have the answers, and then will slowly learn to adapt to it. Then you just focus on the new ways to \" be\" with him, through visits, letters and calls. It\'s not a great thing, but it\'s all we get, so you do get \" used to it\" somewhat.
I have been doing this off and on for years. I get what you are feeling, and it did take me quite awhile to get out of that funk, but I did it, and you can too.
I am your new cheerleader. LOL!
I\'m tired too of wondering how many yrs my guy is going to get, but I have to tell myself we\'ll get through this and I knew what I was getting myself into.
Sleeping is hard when all these thoughts are racing through your mind worrying about him. I take prescription sleep meds ( I have MDD as a result of losing my husband) but sometimes the worry is so strong they don\'t even help.
I really only talk to my friends on here because I got tired of my IRL \"friends\" asking me ,\"what are you thinking?\", \"are you desperate for a man?\", and the list goes on...A little background on my story if that\'s ok. I met my guy 5 1/2 yrs ago yes on a penpal site and that\'s how it was supposed to be, but who knew we\'d fall in love with each other! We were separated for some yrs because of things that happened in his life that he got in trouble again; I was frustrated and every other emotion in the book; I got into a relationship, got married, and have a 2 yr old out of that, but I never stopped loving him for a minute
Yep this is exausting it really is especially at the start right now rest as much as you can you can get over the counter stuff to help you sleep but if it gets much worse see a doc about it. Your mates if they are having a go at you for nog talking to them just tell them that your just not up to it right now and will call them when you are up to it personally i didn\'t really want to be around people at the start as well let a lone talk to anyone about what was going on......its a fast way to work ou who is a true friend and who isn\'t.
Hang in there one day at a time and yes there are going to be days where you have to make yourself do stuff.
The not knowing is the hardest part...where..how long ..etc at least if I knew I could get on with things
Yes not knowing is the worst part of this. It seems it takes forever, so we think of all the worst scenarios that may happen. They may not. It is not easy to wait. We have a big s take in this. We want them home. He may not come home right away, but it may go better than you think.
You wait and wait and drive yourself crazy thinking all kinds of things. And the parts about your own life are up in the air too until you get the answers. Unfortunately these things take a lot of time. I think it\'s part of the justice system\'s little game to punish all of us.
Once you have the answers, you will learn to handle it and adapt. You will still miss him, but at least you know what is going to happen. And we will all be here for you to listen whenever you need us.