I remember when we all could keep track of everyones precious childrens angel date & birthdays. Its impossible now, there are so many... Just know, as you do know, we all are one, we all can understand without even saying anything, its b/c we are all sisters... WOW! I was the only girl in my family, I have 2 best friends, and 1 cousin, who are like my sisters.. One friend, Debby who I grew up with since we both were 4 years old..The other friend, Marie who I met later in life. Marie I believe is my earthly Angel, I had said that to her several times. Now I know, she is an angel.. She is around 64 years in age, about 12,13 years older than me.. When we get together everything seems as though we are in heaven ourselfs. When we talk our words just flow, as though we are one.. If I say something, shes already thinking it or vice versa.... We get goose bumps, and we laugh....My cousin Kathy and I grew up together, we had the same grandparents, we had alot of good times together.. We were always together, sleeping over nanny & papa's house..My father and her mom are siblings...I don't see them as much as I use to...Now I'm getting weller,lol... I'm going to rejoice with them...my promise to myself.......Now I have all you sisters, Wow! I always wanted a sister...God works in mysterious ways!!! God has the plans, I don't...Those are some of my words I say to myself, it helps me through the pain, and to stay sane... I have created alot of words to relieve the pain..It works if you work at it!! Promise...."God has the plans" I have no control, and can't change Gods plans for us... My problem was I wanted to plan my life, I wanted my children to be protected and safe..I want my children with ME...You hear me God? But I can't get my son back. The pain I have is all about getting what I want. When I accept knowing, I'll never get my son back in my life time.. IS WHEN THE PAIN SUBSIDES...Its Gods world not mine.. BOY when I can't get what I want, I go insane.. Selfish AREN"T I!!!!!lol  Thats LIFE> ITS HARD< IT SUCKS< LESS THEN IT USE TO THOUGH!! I'm just learing to adjust!! Wow! HUH!  Love you my friends, Kelly