why does this go on & on. I am so trapped. even with someone to share & talk to,my wonderful husband, i can just barely endure. i am blessed, so much to be thankful for. and yet i hurt so bad. it takes a great effort to just exist & function, I am tired all the time. can't sleep. can't wait to die. i'll try walking more. went today at lunch, did 2 miles. just saying that made me stop crying, wonder why. maybe because it's a positive thought? i'll try another. um............phew..........ahhh.....oh, thank God my husband didn't get hurt in the mva today, that's REAL positive! yeah, that helped. ok,another....................ah........well that last one was pretty good. Oh and it's payday this week. oh and thank God I just paid the car insurance,now that the truck will be in the shop! LOL. wow, this is working. tears have actually stopped. ok, um, saturday we're doing a balloon release, for all our children that have died, in our support group. compassionate friends. you can write a note & attach it to your balloon to send skyward. I gotta think of something to write. ok well, I do feel better. later