Choosing to feel better... I recognized years ago that we do have to make the choice and work toward it... but I will say that with depression I do believe it is harder... its like you're attached to a loaded sled that is loaded with erroneous messages from the past and such sadness... it keeps pulling you back down... You can't just choose to be better... you have to work at it every day... everyone has times when they feel a bit sad... or really really sad... for me depression is more the norm than not... and its only because I keep fighting that I've dog paddled this long... so if I speak of times when I feel sad... discouraged... I'm only temporarily weak... and I'm not a failure... its not that I'm not trying... I am... I'm saying that not just for me but for others who sometimes in spite of trying fall... I don't think a lot of people get that... that we don't just occassionally fall into this sadness... we just occassionally fall into a lesser sadness... and there is very little time for me that I don't fight sadness... this is my life and I'm not whining... Its something I deal with... and that's fine... every one has things they have to deal with... this is one of mine... and God knows I'm not alone...I don't feel bad because I've had to struggle... It will sound crazybut I think my intensity has been more of a blessing than a curse...People say life is for living.... I say living is for loving... deeplyand completely... The struggles I have had... the pain and sorrow in my life... havemeant I have a greater capacity for understanding others... I laughharder... yes I cry harder... and yes I have to struggle... but I'vedone it... I've been doing it for years... and I'm proud of me fordoing it...
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I am proud of you too! It\'s like the saying \"when life gives you lemons, make lemonaid\" it just seems some lemons are sweeter and some more sour. I agree it does give you a greater capacity for understanding. Hoping you get some sweet lemons, luv and hugs-Lauri
You know me too well - I always say I\'m trying and do feel like a failure when my true sadness engulfs me again not that the lesser sadness occurs too often yet but sometimes I feel exhausted just from trying to prevent that all engulfing sadness the ease and freedom to take over again. You have become a very special person to my heart, please know I think of you and Cara so often. My love to you, Lynette ~ Matthews mom
WELL DONE YOU ~ I LOVE YOUR FIGHTING ATTITUDE ~ KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK xx
I think the awareness of our loss weaves in and out of our consciousness and sometimes it is as you describe a lesser sadness and other times desolations strikes fiercely. It is a conscious choice and harder for some to decide that we will not be eternally sad. Realistically we will miss our kids until the day we die but I know each of our kids want us to remember them, think about them, and most importantly to live and be happy. Easier said than done some days but our gift to our children is to try. Love Robin
You know what Elissa? That means you laugh loudest at your friends jokes...you cry harder at your friends pain...you feel everything just as deeply as your friends feel them....it means that you are a gift, a treasure and that kind of friend one hopes for their entire life..... Hey Elissa, thanks for being my friend. Love ya, Kathy
what Kathy said...and I thank you for being my friend as well. Love you!