I thank you all so much that sent words of comfort and caring to deborahd. My heart aches for her...
After Cara died I got a few notes out to people thanking them for their kindnesses... but not many... I kept meaning to but the days passed and I wallowed in my pain and then it seemed redundant...
I wish somehow that we could do those kinds of things for people we care about... I'd never thought of it before...
I've been stalling... wanting to write and not wanting to write... As far as yesterday being the 1 year anniversary for mama's passing... I'm fine... Yesterday around noon Geri's daughter Nancy called... Geri died yesterday around 6am...
My heart aches most of all for her family... She is survived by her mother, 7 children and several stepchildren, several grandchildren, at least one sister... and other family...
For Geri I am glad the pain is over... some people will think that is a terribly cold thing to say or feel... maybe they didn't see Geri these last few months... It was good to see her... but it was painful...
Its okay I hope I brought her comfort... All the flowers and words of comfort will do Geri's family good... but I don't think she'll care about them for herself... so I'm glad I got to bring her a gift before she left this earth...
I will enjoy seeing her again... in the meantime... mama and Geri are both smiling and cackling like two old hens... True? I don't really know... but I like to think so... so I will...
I thank you all as always for being here for me. I truly think this place and we the people... do help each other... and it is good.... Hugs Elissa
After Cara died I got a few notes out to people thanking them for their kindnesses... but not many... I kept meaning to but the days passed and I wallowed in my pain and then it seemed redundant...
I wish somehow that we could do those kinds of things for people we care about... I'd never thought of it before...
I've been stalling... wanting to write and not wanting to write... As far as yesterday being the 1 year anniversary for mama's passing... I'm fine... Yesterday around noon Geri's daughter Nancy called... Geri died yesterday around 6am...
My heart aches most of all for her family... She is survived by her mother, 7 children and several stepchildren, several grandchildren, at least one sister... and other family...
For Geri I am glad the pain is over... some people will think that is a terribly cold thing to say or feel... maybe they didn't see Geri these last few months... It was good to see her... but it was painful...
Its okay I hope I brought her comfort... All the flowers and words of comfort will do Geri's family good... but I don't think she'll care about them for herself... so I'm glad I got to bring her a gift before she left this earth...
I will enjoy seeing her again... in the meantime... mama and Geri are both smiling and cackling like two old hens... True? I don't really know... but I like to think so... so I will...
I thank you all as always for being here for me. I truly think this place and we the people... do help each other... and it is good.... Hugs Elissa
Replies
Hi Elissa!
Oh I do understand...it is good that there is no more pain. When I miss my sister so much I cringe..my mom says she would never want her back if she had to be in so much pain again.
As far as responding to the kindness expressed, let me say something. My son died 24 years ago at age 3. As you can imagine there was a huge outpouring of love and support. I felt badly that I was so numb I couldn\'t respond. I put all these messages in a box with Timmy\'s autopsy and death certificate. A few years ago while digging through family pictures with my girls I came across that box. I steeled myself and we went through it letter by letter...card by card. Many of these people are still in our lives. Can you love people more than you thought you did? It made me feel closer to them..more loyal...they understood then something that I could not comprehend. So I guess their comfort coming 20 years latter reached something in me that was unreachable then. I found out later my daughter Amy wrote to a couple of people telling them of our day and thanking them for how their letters touched us. Yes, it hurt for that time to come back so vividly but it was strangely comforting remembering the love.
Kathy
The best gifts in life are the ones that touch our hearts the most....
and sometimes, even a touch that is loving and gentle
can make you cry.
I love you E.
And YOU are just as much of a gift as DS itself.
I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND WHY YOU ARE HAPPY FOR GERI. MY SISTER HURT SO BADLY I COULDN\'T EVEN TOUCH HER WITHOUT ADDING TO HER PAIN. SO WHEN I AM REALLY ANGRY AND REALLY MISSING HER, I KNOW IN MY HEART SHE IS BETTER OFF. I WOULD NEVER WANT HER TO GO THROUGH THAT PAIN AGAIN. HOWEVER I WOULD LIKE HER TO COME BACK WELL. THAT IS THE HARD PART. THHANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH AN INSPIRATION HERE ON DS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ((((((((((HUGS)))))))))) LISA
Elissa,
What is deborhd website name here? I don\'t know it and would like to offer he some hugs, love, and comfort. Thanks. Betty
Elissa, I am so sorry about Geri but I agree they are cackling away in heaven. She is finally out of pain and back to her old self. And now Cara has another fine woman to look after her until you can yourself. Keep the faith my friend, we will all be with our children again. Lots of hugs, Jake\'s mom, Kathy
hugs, my Elissa!!! you are a comfort here, i can only imagine how Geri felt to see you there. love you!!!!!
I don\'t think that is a bad thing to say at all.. It is very true in many situations.... in heaven they are pain free so we should be happy for them right? :)
I think what you said is very true...her pain is over. Just a few weeks ago, for the first times since Jon passed, I woke up and looked at his picture by my bed and thought to myself \"Thank God...I don\'t have to worry about you....you are in the the best hands of all\" and I had a sense of peace, and to explain it out loud...it sounds horrible, but the feeling I got at the time was Euphoric, because I knew he was in safer than any of us here on earth, and could not be hurt by anyone or anything ever again. And as much as I miss him, and as sad as I am without him, I imagined that Euphoric feeling must be what Heaven is like...no worries at all. If they have a prom up there...maybe Cara will go with Jon??? XOXOXO Elissa....from Carole