I hear you. IZZY25 I think is her screen name.. more or less she's either very sick or she has no soul... She has been writing to people making up sad stories... but as with all lies she got caught on the details..
I am just upset because I let myself get upset... so I'm trying to get myself together... I am a fool and just let myself get bent out of shape even when I say I'm not going to.
I also have another problem... I have 2 friends here on ds... that I have exchanged phone calls with... and now... they hardly ever talk to me... so it hurts... I don't know why this has happened...
So since I've imposed so much I'll go one more... I'm tired of being sick and tired... I've been fighting infection ever since about a month after Cara died...
I should be writing comforting words to you... but I am having a real hard time seeing as I'm writing through tears... For someone who can't see I'm spelling fine... that's because I have this perfectionistic streak that causes things to take forever because I go back and redo and redo...
I don't want you to feel sorry for me please... I would appreciate your prayers... both for my mental and physical health.
Feeling sorry for me... That's not what this letter is about... Its trying to explain what's going on with me... and to answer your question about izzy lizzy... I made up the name as a sign of disrespect because I thought she deserved it... I don't like what she did... even though it wasn't to me personally... I just don't want to let her control me.
I wrote this letter to a friend here on ds and then I thought I'd write it here. Its another apology and an excuse... what can I say... I am trying... that's all I can offer. Hugs to all Elissa
I am just upset because I let myself get upset... so I'm trying to get myself together... I am a fool and just let myself get bent out of shape even when I say I'm not going to.
I also have another problem... I have 2 friends here on ds... that I have exchanged phone calls with... and now... they hardly ever talk to me... so it hurts... I don't know why this has happened...
So since I've imposed so much I'll go one more... I'm tired of being sick and tired... I've been fighting infection ever since about a month after Cara died...
I should be writing comforting words to you... but I am having a real hard time seeing as I'm writing through tears... For someone who can't see I'm spelling fine... that's because I have this perfectionistic streak that causes things to take forever because I go back and redo and redo...
I don't want you to feel sorry for me please... I would appreciate your prayers... both for my mental and physical health.
Feeling sorry for me... That's not what this letter is about... Its trying to explain what's going on with me... and to answer your question about izzy lizzy... I made up the name as a sign of disrespect because I thought she deserved it... I don't like what she did... even though it wasn't to me personally... I just don't want to let her control me.
I wrote this letter to a friend here on ds and then I thought I'd write it here. Its another apology and an excuse... what can I say... I am trying... that's all I can offer. Hugs to all Elissa
Replies
Hi E!
I\'m soooooo sorry this whole mess with lizzy has cost you friendships. Perhaps I was able to keep myself removed from it because I saw the same sort of thing happen on the PTSD boards and they tore each other apart like monkeys on cupcakes (isn\'t that a GREAT visual?)!!!
In any case, one of the things I\'ve been trying to teach myself here is not to take too much on. In the form of people, friends, their problems and so forth. In the past I haven\'t been able to learn how or where to draw my line and have suffered for it. So DS has helped manage that in my life as well as my grief. The one thing I keep trying to remind myself is that our despair and loneliness makes our emotions all off-kilter. Feelings we might have been able to negotiate in the past will knock us for a loop now..............
I think I\'m going to just stay the heck off the Bereavement Boards until this whole thing blows over. They have never really been what I\'m here for anyhow............
Hang in there E........... This too will pass
and I will still be here for you when it does. :-)