Today I feel anxious.  I went to a Birthday party for my godchildren yesterday afternoon, and I felt out of place, it felt like everyone was staring at me, and everyone knew  about me and my past.  This made me feel anxious.  Today I went to a parade that my husband and kids were in, I had to go by myself and I felt the same way.  I feel like cutting very badly.  I have to go to work, and box cutters are everywhere, they are easily accessible to me.  I haven't cut in four months and I am afraid I will do it today, because I am very anxious today.  I think I will have to give my therapist a call today.  I jsut need some reassurance that I will be okay.  God I hate when I feel like this.