bits

life seems as its fading away slowly day by day, woundering what will happen if certain things were different, what life would be like . waisting time waisting life , what is the point of life , get up go school , waist time let people grade ur effort and the things u learn, then eventually get work get up go to work go home clean eat , waist more time pick up after ur self and others u live with , the man i live with , is my bf , i pick up after him , laundry , dishes , garbige , he leaves salt and pepper , sauces for foods juices jugs, and dishes, in the living room , when he does put dishes in the kitchen in the sink he leaves his garbige in it as well , and he nags at me when i leave somthing or mess up on somthing,,,  and when i try to get my needs met in the bedroom i get denied , i dont know whats going through his head... does he hate me made at me what , i watch him laying in bed jerking it , insted of trying to seduce me ? what the fuck is this , this is almost going the same way as as ray and i went ... except i got more attention then , i was still able to suduce him but caint with this guy , i feel im at his beck and call , house maid