Another update

Well, I just got home from work and it's day 2. The day went ok. There was a great deal if planning involved for special projects that are going on. I am trying very very hard not to think about my financial bombshell looming as as I previously explained but it's so hard not too. I did speak to an attorney and she basically told me to stop attempting to pay bills since I won't be able to pay them all. Basically I was told that I'll have to wait until October to file bankruptcy because if my situation. I don't wanna file but my past binging on money finally caught up to me. Once I realized how bad off I was I called all my card companies and cancelled /closed them all out. A couple days ago I had to take 2 xanex which I didn't need to take in a very long time. Because of my work schedule I can't get into my therapist office till next Monday. My apt is a mess and I am so depressed it's like impossible to declutter it . I even went to a church trying to look for someone honest to help me (not free) but the minister never got back to me. Anyway , I am going to a self help group tonight for 2nd time and I honestly don't know how much help they will be as I didn't feel a real warm connection when I was there on first time but I will make the effort. I guess I will now call me mom in Florida and tell her everything is good as she is not in greatest Heath.