Sad tonight, Freddy just called, can't remember if I told him to or not tonight? I ask him "DID YOU FEEL ME"? His responce was well what do you think, whats worrying you???? "US", is worrying me, I cried, they are playing with his mail, and I believe him on this cause of what happened at X-Mas time, and this has happened before, he has been writing, and I'm not receiving his mail, he had a home made Valentines Day Card made, I never received it, not as of yet? He isn't getting my mail either, we check the post marks, and some of the things I send him, or wrote about he is clueless. I don't know why they are fu----g with us, unless its because we are waiting on a responce from parole about another hearing????? A De-Novo.

      He is not a problem prisoner, he does not start problems, and most know not to start with him, he may be a old timer, he will try to reason things out with another, but there are times where things can not be prevented, especially with these baby gang members, most know, or won't play with a man thats been in for almost 40 years. He assures me that we are ok, but are we? His words were kind tonight, no arguing, so the conversation was good, but this mail thing, and now this medical mistake is getting to me.

   I want to see him, but $60.00 dollars is to much for me to afford, and he tells me don't worry about it, in a nice way, I'm just affraid one of us is going to die and I have not seen him in so long. My kid is putting me on a guilt trip about moving, but I am still going to go sneakly to at least see if I can get on housings list, no matter what I do with my penny state income I get screwed up. I would be paying more if I am out on my own, I'm in a catch 2 situation when it comes to moving out. Well journal this is enough for one night.....

                                                           ME