I know at times i have felt frantic to hold on to who i was before.   We have stepped into another world.  We live in two places at once... a world of none tbi and  we live in a tbi.   Does that make since?     And we find our self trying to live both ways.   When i am out in public I try to seem normal; no one knows i have a tbi.    But in my home and around those closest to me ;  they see the tbi  and i feel it at every turn and every thought.   Knowledge empowers.  just like knowing that the new med gapapentin is affecting my mood negatively;  that it is not all me.  And while my circumstances are not what i want and it is affecting me greatly;  the med is tipping the scales.  I need to find a way to counter balance.   I think i may need some kind of work book  , i would go to a counseling class or such, but this stupid thing called driving is a major hindrance.    Not being able to drive adds to my suffering and bad attitude... hum see there goes the gapapentin again.  so good to have something to blame the downer attitude on.  smiles and lol.