Same stuff is going on since last time I journaled.  The neighbors dogs are barking and my colon is fussy/hurts  thus causing anxiety.  The local book store has calender type items on sale.  I got an origami a day calender and a water color a day calender. I thumbed through the origami calender and was disappointed; nothing exciting or new. I will use the paper to fold some of my favorite origami folds.  I am already making use of the watercolor calender.   I have painted two pictures from the watercolor a day calender.  One picture is of an outside cafe and the other a field of flowers.   I have cycled in to a bit of despair and not happy with having the tbi.  So frustrated again with trying to do stuff and can not do it.  I tried again to knit the fan and feather pattern and I still can NOT do it, frown.  I can not keep count of the stitches and I can not keep track of the stitch pattern changes. I do not understand the mechanic of the fan and feather stitches.  The stitches were in sets of six but I could not multiply or divide by six to know how many stitches I needed for a group of stitches.  It is hard to think and relax with the neighbors dog barking none stop for hours.   I and my other neibors have called the police and animal control.  I do not understand why this dog owner is allowed to get away with their dog running lose through the neighborhood, barking all night and day, and bit a child...  sigh.  sounds like another sleepless night.  My sight and brain are hazed over in a fog and haze that i try to work in anyway: I am well aware there is not way out of this maze.  Life feels hazy and unclear; Life looks sometimes clear and sometimes not.  Noise hurts my head; the dogs are still barking.   Just a bad moment, sigh.  I have tomorrow's watercolor calender page to look forward to, another chapter in the book i am reading, and the housekeeper comes and yeah tai chi with friends. still feel grumpy.