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Haven't been here since oct 2008. I have had a horrible last 2 years. I lost my mother. Then an ex on my birthday, with my brother in law the following day. Lost 3 friendships within 6 months( 2 for 35yrs). I have gain a massive amount of weight and lost all motivation. I have been on and off meds for a few weeks now and it is starting to show. All I do is sit in front of the computer and Facebook and second life. I have said several prays to get me through and I think I helps. But the damage is done and is something I will have to deal with soon. I am sick to my stomach. I will start by writing in my journal here. Hoping things will look better as I read them. The good thing is that I quit smoking in April. Well hate writing but this was a start.
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Wow..just looked at the post from 2013. Well have hooked up with Chris for a while but that just did not work out. Then John and I got back in touch. Still a little rocky but we still talk.I now have issuance and have been having tests for stomach and back. Waiting on results fr stomach,have haital hernia. Smoking again and have a 3mm nodual in my lung...has not change so I am ok for now. Housing and relationship is very stable compared to the past. Tight...but we need to make a plan. But I am afraid if I need surgery, the summer will be ruined and nothing will get done. I will to be to blame. But I am so tired of living in pain. I have finally been given a med I have been want for a long time, topamax,side effect is weight loss. been on it a week and ready working. Happy about that..
Well, think that is it for now. Put this in my book marks cuz I forgot all about this site. Hope to visit it more often and just vent.Maybe it will be good for me.