blah
it's friday............ hear a lot of that on friday's..........know what day it is for me? it's day 40 without my son.
Feel like I'm in a whirlwind.............or a tornado..........yeah tornado more like.
My coworker is driving me nuts already and it's not even 8am. I just want to tell her to go away, but I wont............
Still haven't gotten Brandon's death certificate............. what is the hold up........... it will be 7 weeks on sunday........... I don't even want to think about the ME report........ what a thankless job they have........... but grateful that they have the strength to do what they do.
Wednesday I picked up the memorial tshirts that some school friends of Brandon had made, to sponsor a memorial brick that will go on top of memorial hill........ they sold over 120 shirts.......... what a great group of kids. The front says
In Memory of Brandon C. Angell 1994-2014 Gone but never forgotten
The back of his tshirt has his tattoo printed on it.
God give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.
Still haven't gotten a grave marker for Brandon...........Don't even want to think about that yet. His father hasn't mentioned it...........and that's ok with me....... have had to many icky days lately....... don't need to ADD one. It will happen when we're both ready I suppose. Brandon was 8 months old when his father and I got divorced. he's pretty much been an asshole his entire life. he's remarried now with 2 other children, his wife shelly......... is a bitch. I think she exists to make my life miserable. I finally had it with her a week or so ago............. and snapped. Haven't spoken to her since. Don't act like some grieving mother blah blah blah..............bitch that's MY position not YOURS. Brandon had his days with her............. complained often that she was so nosy. he said that she treated him like the bastard stepchild.
After Brandon died......... 3 days later I picked his cell phone up from the police station. There were 2 messages on it.............. he wasn't dead for 24 hours and someone was trying to access his facebook account.......... I went batshit crazy. then found out 3 days after that, that she did INDEED access his facebook account and changed the password so she could access it anytime that she wanted. man was I PISSED!!! then act like some godly saint and trying to convince me that there was nothing wrong with that. F-you was my response to her. she added people and adjusted his settings......... read ALL of the private messages. She invaded his privacy while he was alive and now she was doing it after his death. Long story short...........She caved a few days after that and gave me the password............ well bitch your days of invading his privacy are OVER. I changed his password and double secured it so she couldn't log into it. I had 2 messages from her within 20 minutes of changing it. she was pissed. I told her she was nosy and it wasn't her business to dig into his private life. She asked me who gave me the authority to take it upon myself to change his password.............. again I unleashed on her. Told her that I ALONE am his MOTHER and she will no longer disrespect his memory by invading his privacy. Then I contacted facebook and had it changed to a memorial..........so NOBODY will ever access it again. including me. Brandon would want it that way. Told her where to go and how to get there and told her if there is one more word about this that it will get deleted permanently. haven't heard a peep about it since.
Then she started in on about the cell phone.............. Told her she wasn't getting it. EVER. she said they had a right to see it. blah blah blah.............. I said his FATHER has a right to see it and when I get a request directly from HIM I will meet with HIM and HIM alone and he can look at whatever he wants............. yup you guessed it............she didn't say a word. it's been a battle through this whole thing.............. so done with her. bitch.
ok been rambling on all morning.............
so it's friday.......... blah...
Feel like I'm in a whirlwind.............or a tornado..........yeah tornado more like.
My coworker is driving me nuts already and it's not even 8am. I just want to tell her to go away, but I wont............
Still haven't gotten Brandon's death certificate............. what is the hold up........... it will be 7 weeks on sunday........... I don't even want to think about the ME report........ what a thankless job they have........... but grateful that they have the strength to do what they do.
Wednesday I picked up the memorial tshirts that some school friends of Brandon had made, to sponsor a memorial brick that will go on top of memorial hill........ they sold over 120 shirts.......... what a great group of kids. The front says
In Memory of Brandon C. Angell 1994-2014 Gone but never forgotten
The back of his tshirt has his tattoo printed on it.
God give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.
Still haven't gotten a grave marker for Brandon...........Don't even want to think about that yet. His father hasn't mentioned it...........and that's ok with me....... have had to many icky days lately....... don't need to ADD one. It will happen when we're both ready I suppose. Brandon was 8 months old when his father and I got divorced. he's pretty much been an asshole his entire life. he's remarried now with 2 other children, his wife shelly......... is a bitch. I think she exists to make my life miserable. I finally had it with her a week or so ago............. and snapped. Haven't spoken to her since. Don't act like some grieving mother blah blah blah..............bitch that's MY position not YOURS. Brandon had his days with her............. complained often that she was so nosy. he said that she treated him like the bastard stepchild.
After Brandon died......... 3 days later I picked his cell phone up from the police station. There were 2 messages on it.............. he wasn't dead for 24 hours and someone was trying to access his facebook account.......... I went batshit crazy. then found out 3 days after that, that she did INDEED access his facebook account and changed the password so she could access it anytime that she wanted. man was I PISSED!!! then act like some godly saint and trying to convince me that there was nothing wrong with that. F-you was my response to her. she added people and adjusted his settings......... read ALL of the private messages. She invaded his privacy while he was alive and now she was doing it after his death. Long story short...........She caved a few days after that and gave me the password............ well bitch your days of invading his privacy are OVER. I changed his password and double secured it so she couldn't log into it. I had 2 messages from her within 20 minutes of changing it. she was pissed. I told her she was nosy and it wasn't her business to dig into his private life. She asked me who gave me the authority to take it upon myself to change his password.............. again I unleashed on her. Told her that I ALONE am his MOTHER and she will no longer disrespect his memory by invading his privacy. Then I contacted facebook and had it changed to a memorial..........so NOBODY will ever access it again. including me. Brandon would want it that way. Told her where to go and how to get there and told her if there is one more word about this that it will get deleted permanently. haven't heard a peep about it since.
Then she started in on about the cell phone.............. Told her she wasn't getting it. EVER. she said they had a right to see it. blah blah blah.............. I said his FATHER has a right to see it and when I get a request directly from HIM I will meet with HIM and HIM alone and he can look at whatever he wants............. yup you guessed it............she didn't say a word. it's been a battle through this whole thing.............. so done with her. bitch.
ok been rambling on all morning.............
so it's friday.......... blah...
Replies
I hope your days gets better.... love ya!
Oh how I feel your pain on the ex...I separated/divorced in 1994 - my ex was a mostly absent father, especially as the boys got older, and he only lived 15 minutes away. I have to say I enjoyed not having to talk/see/deal with him, but my heart breaks for my boys. Still does. This week I am currently in family drama with ex and his girlfriend over lies he has told her - my son was furious and posted on facebook the truths so that family could see. She had the nerve to tell me that I mistreated my ex and his family at Doug\'s services. And, she is a greiving mom, lost an infant. She wants to criticize me for not comforting them who hardly ever saw my boys? There\'s alot of other things she accused me of. Oh, it just doesn\'t end. Hoping you will find some neutral ground with them. As far as the certificate goes, that is another stab in the heart, sat in my car and sobbed. Much love to you. Sue xo
I just want her to go sit in a corner and mind her own business. She\'s not his MOTHER........... and stepping in where she has no business stepping in really makes my blood boil........... heard the same shit from her........... well I\'m a grieving mother too, I\'ve had a miscarriage............... blah blah blah........... well if we\'re going tit for tat......... I\'ve had two miscarriages, my oldest son ended up in a wheelchair at the age of 4, and my youngest son just died.
Why do these people not understand.......... The lady at the funeral home got it, she made her \'leave the room\' while his father and I made arrangements. and I didn\'t even have to say anything............ that made it a bit easier...........without her nosy ass sticking her two cents into it.
But anyway......... thanks for the re-assurance. It totally helps!
Love you guys!!!
Lis
IT SUCKS TO DEAL WITH EX\'S AND ESPECIALLY THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS.....It sickens me to see how much you are dealing with because dealing with our child\'s death is overwhelming in itself. Your emotions are so raw and the coping ability that we once had we no longer have.....You are doing the right thing for your son, Brandon. Only you as his mother would know what he would want done....We are always the Mama Bear :)
((hugs)) to you today...so glad you are here. Vicki