This writing is supposed to help me in someway or the other...here goes...

I am still out on disability, I could barely keep afloat, marriage is falling apart, my bones are killing me in pain, but nevertheless life is good, so to speak...for one thing I should be glad I am still alive, right?

Sometimes I just want to die, or maybe start over or something, I am so miserable and noone seems to care, not my wife I am sure. I am so lonely and pathetic...ohhhhh.Why do I bother taking the meds.
I am thinking my 5 year old needs me, I will get better, life would turn around.

Oh well...just another day in paradise.........