Its been 29 days since we last talked..
I can't believe that you gave up on me. it's still weird for me to admit it, to believe it. My bearded teddy bear... how I loved spending hours touching your beard and playing with you. how I lived when you held me and told me you loved me... how you caught my hand and kissed it. and would tell me that you would do that forever, till we were really old.
I miss the warmth you made me feel whenever you had me in your arms. I felt so protected, like nothing in this world would ever hurt again. like all my problems would disappear.
patience. I just needed that my love... Just a little patience... sometimes I even doubt if what you felt was real or it was simply your hormones talking. if you were jn love with me or it was just that fascination process at the beginning... the sex..
I would miss you even when I had you because sometimes I would feel that you would stay if we did something but you would go do your stuff if we didn't.. I felt pressure. that's why in the last tries I wouldn't want to sleep with you. I was scared that you would only want me that way. I wasn't rejecting you, I was afraid... and you thought I didn't live you anymore. I just needed your f patience!
you know what? I will be alright after you. I do miss how loved you made me feel, how warmth... but I also remember how caring I was to you and how you would leave me alone when I explicitly told you I wasn't feeling well. we all make sacrifices for the ones we love and I would feel like it wasn't my place to ask you anything.
I'll be alright. I am discovering that I can hug myself, that artery the tears the world doesn't end. that after feeling phisically broken, I'm getting the scars and they do feel kind of good. I'm healing and I'm taking care of myself. you don't so I got no other option.
I feel bored.. and that has been my worst enemy.. boredom. because I think about you, about us and my heart trembles a little.okay.. it trembles a lot.
I won't talk to you... it's getting hard now... but I won't call you just today. and tomorrow I'll say the same thing and one day at a time. and it will come one day when I won't want to call you. because you are not the.man that deserves me handing my heart to.
I can't believe that you gave up on me. it's still weird for me to admit it, to believe it. My bearded teddy bear... how I loved spending hours touching your beard and playing with you. how I lived when you held me and told me you loved me... how you caught my hand and kissed it. and would tell me that you would do that forever, till we were really old.
I miss the warmth you made me feel whenever you had me in your arms. I felt so protected, like nothing in this world would ever hurt again. like all my problems would disappear.
patience. I just needed that my love... Just a little patience... sometimes I even doubt if what you felt was real or it was simply your hormones talking. if you were jn love with me or it was just that fascination process at the beginning... the sex..
I would miss you even when I had you because sometimes I would feel that you would stay if we did something but you would go do your stuff if we didn't.. I felt pressure. that's why in the last tries I wouldn't want to sleep with you. I was scared that you would only want me that way. I wasn't rejecting you, I was afraid... and you thought I didn't live you anymore. I just needed your f patience!
you know what? I will be alright after you. I do miss how loved you made me feel, how warmth... but I also remember how caring I was to you and how you would leave me alone when I explicitly told you I wasn't feeling well. we all make sacrifices for the ones we love and I would feel like it wasn't my place to ask you anything.
I'll be alright. I am discovering that I can hug myself, that artery the tears the world doesn't end. that after feeling phisically broken, I'm getting the scars and they do feel kind of good. I'm healing and I'm taking care of myself. you don't so I got no other option.
I feel bored.. and that has been my worst enemy.. boredom. because I think about you, about us and my heart trembles a little.okay.. it trembles a lot.
I won't talk to you... it's getting hard now... but I won't call you just today. and tomorrow I'll say the same thing and one day at a time. and it will come one day when I won't want to call you. because you are not the.man that deserves me handing my heart to.
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