I feel out of myself.
I feel like me just left my body, I feel like I can't be all alone after I've been with someone that used to held my hand every time we were jn the street.. how I miss holding your hand...
I feel that you didn't fight for me, you needed time and I needed you!I needed to see that you care, I needed comforting hugs and not pressure to feel okay. I needed my emotional needs satisfied and not mocked or that you took them as an insult.
all I needed was a hug. and that I tried to explain million of times and ... where's thé hug? I know you won't even care about what I write because you put this into your head, that you want and will forget about me, and congrats for that. but I just thought I meant more to you... I really did. and I'm probably being selfish but I don't want my maty to kiss some other girl and five her those eyes that belong to me..
but you don't want me anymore you've told me that. so why do I keep thinking all of this, why do I keep battling this?why do I keep looking outside the window waiting to see you come for me? when you've told me you given up?
it's called hope.but I need to have self respect and love.I need care too and I can't or want to demand it from you.. Ite needs to be freely given and words don't build a relationship. actions do.
Who do I want to be in the future?
I want to be strong, successful and have my economic indépendance and that I will only get through hard work. not by obcessing over a love that is too coward to evolve. I don't want to be a coward. I've done my share of fighting and if you don't want to meet me at the middle and think that this isn't beautiful enough to fight for, I just have one thing to say: farewell and have a good trip. hope you will grow some courage and do what you've told me in the first date :"there are things that are more important than just your job or work, and that's taking care of people you love"... that was true when I've met you.. but guess what, you've became one of those. I'm sorry but the moment you don't let me talk because I wanna tell you that you're making me feel small and prefer to ignore it, it's the moment you're saying you're more jnterested in preserving your ego than to ear me out and meet in the middle.
that's why I fight, because I care. when I stop fighting, I'm giving up.
I'm giving you up.. as you did for me. there's no point if in the only one here hanging onto you because I loved the feelings you gave me. I won't force you or hurt me anymore.I'm in pieces.
I feel like me just left my body, I feel like I can't be all alone after I've been with someone that used to held my hand every time we were jn the street.. how I miss holding your hand...
I feel that you didn't fight for me, you needed time and I needed you!I needed to see that you care, I needed comforting hugs and not pressure to feel okay. I needed my emotional needs satisfied and not mocked or that you took them as an insult.
all I needed was a hug. and that I tried to explain million of times and ... where's thé hug? I know you won't even care about what I write because you put this into your head, that you want and will forget about me, and congrats for that. but I just thought I meant more to you... I really did. and I'm probably being selfish but I don't want my maty to kiss some other girl and five her those eyes that belong to me..
but you don't want me anymore you've told me that. so why do I keep thinking all of this, why do I keep battling this?why do I keep looking outside the window waiting to see you come for me? when you've told me you given up?
it's called hope.but I need to have self respect and love.I need care too and I can't or want to demand it from you.. Ite needs to be freely given and words don't build a relationship. actions do.
Who do I want to be in the future?
I want to be strong, successful and have my economic indépendance and that I will only get through hard work. not by obcessing over a love that is too coward to evolve. I don't want to be a coward. I've done my share of fighting and if you don't want to meet me at the middle and think that this isn't beautiful enough to fight for, I just have one thing to say: farewell and have a good trip. hope you will grow some courage and do what you've told me in the first date :"there are things that are more important than just your job or work, and that's taking care of people you love"... that was true when I've met you.. but guess what, you've became one of those. I'm sorry but the moment you don't let me talk because I wanna tell you that you're making me feel small and prefer to ignore it, it's the moment you're saying you're more jnterested in preserving your ego than to ear me out and meet in the middle.
that's why I fight, because I care. when I stop fighting, I'm giving up.
I'm giving you up.. as you did for me. there's no point if in the only one here hanging onto you because I loved the feelings you gave me. I won't force you or hurt me anymore.I'm in pieces.
Replies
Sibly, I know what you are going through and how painful it feels. I\'m so sorry you\'re in the position you are. I can tell you that, in time, this grief does pass. It makes a lot of hard work and self-reflection, but it does ease. Do you have a therapist or a professional counselor that you can talk with? Journalling always helps, but sometimes it\'s sharing your feelings with someone that can provide objective feedback that helps in the healing process. Just a thought.
I\'m sending you strength and support today. \"The only way out is through.\" xo
thank you very much :) I\'ve talked to one of my professors but she didn\'t reply yet.. I\'ve been talking to a friend about this and I really hope this will pass.
I\'m perfectly conscient that he is doing the \"forget about me\" steps and when he puts something into his mind there is no turning back... ive tried m\'y best.. I really think I have.. and that isn\'t enough. so.. I\'m changing what I can change and accept what I can\'t, and what i can change right now, it\'s myself. big hug @penseuse I know it\'s silly because it\'s my 1st love and you have stories way more difficult..of years and years of marriage.. s u do feel silly for being so down when there\'s so much worse.. keep strong. and thank you for taking time in reading this
You should never feel silly about your feelings. Your pain is no different than anyone else\'s. Much support~