lost

I don't know how this works, so I'll just tell my story. We had my wife's sister down for the weekend on Thanksgiving. My wife got up Friday morning and said she didn't feel like she could entertain company, and asked me to drive her sister home. When I returned home I found the dog locked in the bedroom, and my wife gone. I called 911 and asked if they had sent an ambulance to my address. They said they had, and that the woman said she was having terrible chest pain and could not wait for her husband to come home. She had a major heart attack by the time I made it to the hospital. She was put into an induced coma for eight days. When they brought her out of the coma, the first thing she said was "did you take your pills" I thought things were looking up. But at 2:30 everything went haywire and she was gone by 3:00. We were married for 43 yrs. no kids. and together 24/7 for 15 yrs since I retired. I am finding it so hard to find a reason to go on. The silence is deafening. I find myself going to bed at 9:30 10 o'clock because I can't stand it. I really miss my girl