It is almost 5am on Friday morning, Forth of July.  I am up...can't sleep.  I have a large sore bump on the right side of my scalp, which I have pulled all of the hair away from.  I can't relax, and I can't keep my hand away from that spot.  I just want to stop doing this.  I have had trich for a long time...it orignally started when I was 8 years old.  I pulled all of my eyelashes out, then started on my hair.  By the time I was 10, I had stopped completely.  Then at the age of  27, I started again, with lashes and eyebrows.  It has been pretty much non-stop ever since, with a few months in between where I was able to stop.  I am 43 now, and I suppose I will have this for the rest of my life.  I have been in therapy, have been on medication, you name it.  It always comes back.  I had a psychiatrist tell me that I probably wouldn't be able to stop, that Trichotillomania is that tough.