Day 6
Yesterday was a long day. I'm exhausted, but in a good way, not a hungover way. When I woke this morning my body was still a little on the tight side and I was a little surprised that I felt nauseous. I was thinking maybe I'd worked my way through that part of it, but it passed fairly quickly. Yesterday I was fuzzy headed again in the morning, but at my break I drank a sugary drink and eventually the fuzziness passed.
Today I slept and hour later. I think that was a good decision. I will miss the exercise and stretching, but I can listen to tonglen for my short drive to work.
Last night I left work and was able to drive straight home without stopping at the liquor store. I'm happy with that. Last night was doubly challenging because I had to go out again later to meet with my two foreign exchange students. The drive to meet them took me within the vicinity of many liquor stores. I had to pass this challenge twice today. The drive there wasn't that hard, and truthfully the drive home wasn't that hard until I started thinking this is easier than I thought it would be. Just thinking about it being easy, just thinking about alcohol in any way at all, made me start thinking about drinking, stopping at a liquor store. It felt so ridiculous...I just couldn't believe what I'd gotten myself into because then I had to struggle with not going.
Thoughts like: this has been a really long day. I'm tired. It'd be nice to have a drink when I get home and just unwind...yada, yada, yada. Of course that's not how it would be. I'd drink the whole bottle. I stopped and got a root beer float and eventually it passed. It was really close...I could have seen myself at another time making a completely different decision....but here, in this instance, I didn't. I'm proud of that, and root beer floats are pretty tasty.
Sticking to my same goals today. I did do my second break yesterday. I hit both my breaks and my lunch. I'm really keeping on track with my eating. Try for more water today. I drank some yesterday but not enough. So breaks, lunch, water, breathing.
And again my biggest goal is not to go to the liquor store after work. This my Friday today. Usually this would mean the freedom to get as drunk as I cared to be, no work, no obligations at all. This is going to be a challenge that I can face. I can do it. Take the challenge of tonight first, and then think about how you will occupy yourself each day of your weekend. I have a feeling I shouldn't play it by ear, but have a definite or at least a loose plan. The garage could always use a cleaning. It would be kind of fun to get the tent together and maybe set it up in the yard. I'll think on it.
Go home along the river. Take the highway. Go straight home. I am not alone in this struggle. I am committed to meeting this goal. My commitment is not halfway or for a few days or until I don't feel like it any longer. I do not drink.
Today I slept and hour later. I think that was a good decision. I will miss the exercise and stretching, but I can listen to tonglen for my short drive to work.
Last night I left work and was able to drive straight home without stopping at the liquor store. I'm happy with that. Last night was doubly challenging because I had to go out again later to meet with my two foreign exchange students. The drive to meet them took me within the vicinity of many liquor stores. I had to pass this challenge twice today. The drive there wasn't that hard, and truthfully the drive home wasn't that hard until I started thinking this is easier than I thought it would be. Just thinking about it being easy, just thinking about alcohol in any way at all, made me start thinking about drinking, stopping at a liquor store. It felt so ridiculous...I just couldn't believe what I'd gotten myself into because then I had to struggle with not going.
Thoughts like: this has been a really long day. I'm tired. It'd be nice to have a drink when I get home and just unwind...yada, yada, yada. Of course that's not how it would be. I'd drink the whole bottle. I stopped and got a root beer float and eventually it passed. It was really close...I could have seen myself at another time making a completely different decision....but here, in this instance, I didn't. I'm proud of that, and root beer floats are pretty tasty.
Sticking to my same goals today. I did do my second break yesterday. I hit both my breaks and my lunch. I'm really keeping on track with my eating. Try for more water today. I drank some yesterday but not enough. So breaks, lunch, water, breathing.
And again my biggest goal is not to go to the liquor store after work. This my Friday today. Usually this would mean the freedom to get as drunk as I cared to be, no work, no obligations at all. This is going to be a challenge that I can face. I can do it. Take the challenge of tonight first, and then think about how you will occupy yourself each day of your weekend. I have a feeling I shouldn't play it by ear, but have a definite or at least a loose plan. The garage could always use a cleaning. It would be kind of fun to get the tent together and maybe set it up in the yard. I'll think on it.
Go home along the river. Take the highway. Go straight home. I am not alone in this struggle. I am committed to meeting this goal. My commitment is not halfway or for a few days or until I don't feel like it any longer. I do not drink.
Replies