Had one of those "1st half-of-the-day" days where I thought I was going to scream every 5 secs...nothing I touched worked; when my tasks did work out, no one liked how I did them, and they were done over, again...I held my breath and tried not to stiffen up, ea. time...I wanted to just cry and say, "To hell with this! I'm not coming back!"
'Course, I knew I was being ridiculous, inside--esp. at my age--but it left me feeling poisoned and drained...and there was nothing wrong w/me, when I got up...it's been a beautiful spring day, here, so I have no excuse not to be happy...
Mom was great about it all, but it made me realize how much I truly miss living alone...I had space to just do--or, not do--what I wanted...if I wanted to meditate in a corner, uninterrupted, until dark, then I did it...if I didn't feel like eating dinner, then I didn't...if I wanted to make doilies until two A.M., then I did it...but, I did it, alone, and it was all so peaceful...
Having said all of this, now, I feel ashamed...I know people, here, need me to help them...plus, why should my folks expect me to live here, free, like it's a hotel? (Oh, today, I wish I WAS in a hotel...)
'Course, I knew I was being ridiculous, inside--esp. at my age--but it left me feeling poisoned and drained...and there was nothing wrong w/me, when I got up...it's been a beautiful spring day, here, so I have no excuse not to be happy...
Mom was great about it all, but it made me realize how much I truly miss living alone...I had space to just do--or, not do--what I wanted...if I wanted to meditate in a corner, uninterrupted, until dark, then I did it...if I didn't feel like eating dinner, then I didn't...if I wanted to make doilies until two A.M., then I did it...but, I did it, alone, and it was all so peaceful...
Having said all of this, now, I feel ashamed...I know people, here, need me to help them...plus, why should my folks expect me to live here, free, like it's a hotel? (Oh, today, I wish I WAS in a hotel...)
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