Reflecting
I always believed that there is at least one positive that comes out of every negative event. One positive from cutting my thumb off was the incredible amount of love and support that I received here from my DS friends! It made me feel guilty because I don't make time to read the journals of others.
So I was trying to think of the exact moment, I past my thumb through that saw blade and I couldn't remember! I remember what happened before and after but I couldn't remember doing it! It's almost like, it was meant to happen! I have worked with table saws all my life and have always been extremely careful.
I remember passing the wood through the saw one minute and then the next minute, I remember seeing the top of my thumb hanging by the skin with bright white bone sticking out! I picked up the top half and gently placed it back on top but it wouldn't stay put. I tried it several more times but could just hear bone clanging together. I was amazed that there wasn't more blood then there was.
That was when I held the two parts together as best as I could with my left hand and went inside to have wife call the ambulance. I couldn't help but notice that my cutoff thumb was about an inch shorter then my good thumb. I remember one of the doctors, Melissa, who was one of the trauma surgeons who assisted in the surgery, asking me just before the surgery that, if they couldn't get the proper length back, would it be ok if they made my thumb shorter then the good one? All I could think about was those sideshow freaks at the circus that I use to see when I was a kid. I just politely said, Please do all you can do to make my thumb the way it use to be! So she promised me she would.
When they wheeled me into the recovery room, I woke up to see the dr standing over me and he said it turned out better then he expected it would. I apologized to him for making him work overtime on account of me. It was around midnight when I got to recovery. He said it was ok, he was use to it being the on call surgeon.
It's been 13 days. I am anxious for the swelling to go down and for the pain to go away. I have no health insurance but I have home owners. Wondering how much the premium would go up if I put in a claim. I have filed alot of claims on it through the years. I wonder if they would drop me on this one. I think I will give them a call.
God Bless all my DS friends! I love you all!
So I was trying to think of the exact moment, I past my thumb through that saw blade and I couldn't remember! I remember what happened before and after but I couldn't remember doing it! It's almost like, it was meant to happen! I have worked with table saws all my life and have always been extremely careful.
I remember passing the wood through the saw one minute and then the next minute, I remember seeing the top of my thumb hanging by the skin with bright white bone sticking out! I picked up the top half and gently placed it back on top but it wouldn't stay put. I tried it several more times but could just hear bone clanging together. I was amazed that there wasn't more blood then there was.
That was when I held the two parts together as best as I could with my left hand and went inside to have wife call the ambulance. I couldn't help but notice that my cutoff thumb was about an inch shorter then my good thumb. I remember one of the doctors, Melissa, who was one of the trauma surgeons who assisted in the surgery, asking me just before the surgery that, if they couldn't get the proper length back, would it be ok if they made my thumb shorter then the good one? All I could think about was those sideshow freaks at the circus that I use to see when I was a kid. I just politely said, Please do all you can do to make my thumb the way it use to be! So she promised me she would.
When they wheeled me into the recovery room, I woke up to see the dr standing over me and he said it turned out better then he expected it would. I apologized to him for making him work overtime on account of me. It was around midnight when I got to recovery. He said it was ok, he was use to it being the on call surgeon.
It's been 13 days. I am anxious for the swelling to go down and for the pain to go away. I have no health insurance but I have home owners. Wondering how much the premium would go up if I put in a claim. I have filed alot of claims on it through the years. I wonder if they would drop me on this one. I think I will give them a call.
God Bless all my DS friends! I love you all!
Replies
Proud to be first to say your journal post is great. We are a wonderful family for each other-truly blessed.
Best wishes for your continuing recovery!
lots of love
Dinah xxxxx
Homeowner\'s insurance usually doesn\'t cover events to the home owner himself, at least mine doesn\'t (State Farm). Look into getting on the Medicaid rolls. If your income is below the poverty level, most states have federally funded programs. It\'s insurance, but there\'s no co-payment, and it\'s very, very good insurance - pays for everything. Call social services, there\'s usually a medicaid department, they\'ll tell you if you qualify. Once an application is made, it\'s retroactive. This means any medical expenses from the date of application will be picked up by Medicaid when you are approved. And no hospital or doctor can refuse to treat you.
I really think there are no \"accidents\". I feel this way because I was in a literal wreck (car wreck) many years ago at a time when I was truly an emotional wreck. I honestly did not SEE the car coming but it was clearly THERE or it wouldn\'t have broadsided me! Most people don\'t recall the exact moment of trauma, it\'s the brain\'s mechanism. I DO recall exactly what happened during those moments when I had to make a split second decision (literally) about whether to hit a parked car or a telephone pole. I jammed both feet on the brake pedal and held onto the steering wheel as tight as I could - all in three seconds. When I hit the pole, the car wrapped around it (went off its chasis) and I swung forward toward the windshield and, if not for the death grip I had on the steering wheel, would have gone through the windshield. Just like in the movies: a few seconds seemed to pass soooooo slowly.
You\'re experiencing a lot of emotional trauma. Be careful with yourself. Stay away from sharp objects (lol).
jill