broken...
I'm once again, on the floor, broken and sobbing. One of my closest friends is pregnant. I. JUST. WANT. A. REPREIVE. PLEASE... one single year, where I don't get my heart and soul kicked in, one year to heal and not be reminded of what I almost had and now will never, ever have. just a little time to assess the damage the last 10 years have done, try to overcome some of the pain, in peace and quiet, without having to be happy and smile for anyone else!
I don't want to consider what could have been, I don't want to think about having to give my baby things away for 'someone else to make use of them' because they can no longer be stored where they are. I want just for a single second, to forget this nightmare, to pretend it never happened, to live in a world where I don't mourn the death of my children, my loss of motherhood, the fact that I am now childless not by choice, and that I will forever be fucking stuck in this position.
I don't want to consider what could have been, I don't want to think about having to give my baby things away for 'someone else to make use of them' because they can no longer be stored where they are. I want just for a single second, to forget this nightmare, to pretend it never happened, to live in a world where I don't mourn the death of my children, my loss of motherhood, the fact that I am now childless not by choice, and that I will forever be fucking stuck in this position.
Replies
I am so sorry. Pregnancy announcements are so hard. I still feel so uncomfortable when I have to deal with one. Try not to be too hard on yourself. I\'m sorry you have to go through this. xoxo.
It sucks. I am so so sorry
I all too well understand the pain you have described and are experiencing at this time. It makes me sick to think about the days that I have spent curled up in a ball and crying uncontrollably. My heart hurts for you, Lina- I am so sorry. And please know that you are not alone. No one can know when these situations will get easier to deal with, but there has to be a time when it will. Sending you some peace and strength today...