6 months ago my life changed
John, Well babe, you have been gone 6 months now. Who would have ever thought I would be on this solo journey. It has been a like a rollercoaster the ups and downs, highs and lows from one extreme to the other. I have survived because I am a survivor. Sometime I just wanted to bury my head in the pillow and stay in bed. And other times I would want to just run away. It seemed like a good idea at the time. But I know from experience you have to face your problems head on and deal with them. I have made some good choices and some bad choices. Some I am proud of and some I am not. But through it all lessons have been learned. New friendships have been formed and old ones have been lost but through it all I have gained a new lease on life. Life is too short to worry about the what if's just go for it. Nothing gained nothing loss. I have started working on my bucket list. In a few weeks it will be another challenge as it will be our 33 anniversary the 1st one I will spend without you at my side. I am trusting in "GOD" to help me through it as the next few months will be the hardest I am sure, with my birthday and the "Holidays" coming up it won't be the same. How you loved to light up the outside of the House for the Holidays for all the kids you were like a kid yourself. You never asked for anything you just wanted to make sure everyone else was "HAPPY", that is what I miss the most I could just look at you and smile your Heart was always wide open. How I miss the tender kisses, the hugs, the little look in your eye when you were up to no good. That huge smile that would light up the whole room, I guess I just miss everything about "YOU". Well the tears are starting to flow so I will let you go for a little while. Until we meet again "MY LOVE". Dra'
Replies
All the \"firsts\" hit so hard. Have family around as much as possible and you\'ll get through them. Hugs, Kip.
We all wanted to imagine a life without loss and tragedy, but it just doesn\'t work that way.
You have every reason to max out your life and the time is short for all of us...and tender. Let\'s go for it!
Andree\', as Kip said make sure you have family and friends around during those \"special\" days. It really helps to get you through those days. I know from experience! Spent those days with my kids, and by myself ~~ with someone else -- it really helped get through the worst. You\'ve got a handle on life now, just keep moving and grieve when you need to do so. If you bottle that grief up -- it will come out someway. Then, raise your head and thank the Lord that you are \"making it\" and \"go for it\" as you said.
Hugs, Joely
I got though his birthday and our anniversary with God\'s help. I do hope He helps us both get though the holidays. I have no family here so it will not be easy. But I will get though it as I know you will too. Hugs, Linda