End of the second day since D-day.
We had both lunch and dinner today. After dinner we took a long walk and talked about things. We determined that we don't want to break up, though her year in Europe may make end up in us leaving each other. As it stands now, though, we don't want to break up.
She is going to have a conversation with the OW in about a week or two to tell her that she knows. That's the part I'm dreading, just because I don't want the OW to lie or make my BGF doubt even more. I don't know what will happen, and I can't control it, so I'm trying not to worry.
As we stand now, though, things could be way worse. We have decided to engage each other spiritually, trying to heal by sharing our mutual Faith and make that a central part of the process. We've also started setting small goals. It's all on her terms now. My job is to keep my word, to work my hardest and prove to her that I can earn her trust back, that I can build a new relationship with her and be the man that she needs, and that she can come back to in a year and a half. I'm hoping that time will heal these wounds, but I'm not sure. Right now the biggest thing is to write letters to her. I've started now, writing one letter a day, and I've promised to do that from now until when she gets back from Europe. It's easier to express myself in letters, let her know how I really feel. She says she enjoys them. For the first time, today, I think we may end up being ok. Not that we are ok now, not that we're even NEAR being ok, but I'm beginning to hope that we will end up being ok.
One day at a time.
We had both lunch and dinner today. After dinner we took a long walk and talked about things. We determined that we don't want to break up, though her year in Europe may make end up in us leaving each other. As it stands now, though, we don't want to break up.
She is going to have a conversation with the OW in about a week or two to tell her that she knows. That's the part I'm dreading, just because I don't want the OW to lie or make my BGF doubt even more. I don't know what will happen, and I can't control it, so I'm trying not to worry.
As we stand now, though, things could be way worse. We have decided to engage each other spiritually, trying to heal by sharing our mutual Faith and make that a central part of the process. We've also started setting small goals. It's all on her terms now. My job is to keep my word, to work my hardest and prove to her that I can earn her trust back, that I can build a new relationship with her and be the man that she needs, and that she can come back to in a year and a half. I'm hoping that time will heal these wounds, but I'm not sure. Right now the biggest thing is to write letters to her. I've started now, writing one letter a day, and I've promised to do that from now until when she gets back from Europe. It's easier to express myself in letters, let her know how I really feel. She says she enjoys them. For the first time, today, I think we may end up being ok. Not that we are ok now, not that we're even NEAR being ok, but I'm beginning to hope that we will end up being ok.
One day at a time.
Replies
Need2, first I\'m glad that you are OK and things are looking up.
Second, make sure that your GF DOES NOT confront the OW face to face.
If your GF confronts F2F there may be a physical confrontation.
When is your GF leaving for Europe?
I can\'t really control if she sees the OW face to face, but I doubt either of them will get physical. I think my GF simply wants to \"win\" and make sure that the OW is scared enough of her to stay away from me? I\'m keeping my opinions to myself on the issue, simply because 1) I have no rights to ask anything like this of my GF right now 2) her temper may cool before she actually does anything and 3) the thought of the OW actually makes me more than a little nauseous right now.
I want to be more positive and supportive of my GF more than anything else. She tells me that the biggest thing she needs of me is to learn to be happy, and that\'s my biggest priority right now...
Seems if you are letting the OW go, she should try to as well. Nothing good can come of them getting together...this is just guaranteed! Never have you heard a story of 2 people like this getting together and good coming from it! Best of luck!!