Here is a few quotes from our local paper under the section titled "THE SCRIBE" written by Damon Hanshaw.  The laughs really cheered me up and hope they give you the giggles as much as they did me.  Here are just a few.

1) A Sunday school teacher was trelling her class the story of the Good Samaritan,  in which a man was beaten, robbed and left for dead.  She described the situation in vivid detail so her students would catch the drama.  Then she ask the class, "If you saw a person lying on the roadside all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?"  A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence...."I think I'd throw up!"

2) Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child.  Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told that if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that."  Bobby look up and replied, "Well, Ms. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."

3) The pastor was about to take the offering and asked if anyone would like to sing a special.  My friend's 6 yr old daughter raised her hand.  Her mother reached out to grab her hand and pull it down but it was too late.  The paster saw it...called out to her and asked her to come forward and share her song.  She stood up straight and grabbed the microphone and proceeded to sing...."Well, I'm a red neck woman, ain't no high class broad."

4) Visiting his grandparents, a small boy opened the big family Bible.  He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.  Suddenly, something fell out.  He picked it up and found that it was an old leaf that had been pressed flat between the pages.  "Mama, look what I found!" he called out.  "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked.  With awe and astonishment in his voice, the boy answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"