7:15 pmToday will be the first day in like 6 months that I haven't talked to my husband. It is a little weird to me that he hasn't called me at all today. He normally calls me at least once a day, but today he hasn't even tried to call me. It does make me a little sad. Even though I wouldn't answer the phone if he did call, it has still been nice to know that he called me everyday just to talk. I am very sad today and still want to cry about the divorce, but I don't feel as hopeless as I have in the last month. I am just sad because I never wanted my life to be this way. I never wanted my child to grow up in a broken home. I never wanted to seperated from my husband. But I am not sad because I feel like my life is over. It is just different now. I desire to be in a relationship with someone and be loved by a man, but I am not so desperate to go back into the situation that I was in before. In a way there is a bit of happiness that lies beneath all the sadness. The happiness comes from knowing that it is only going to get better from here. I feel that my journals are just going to be boring from now on.