Not doing any better today. I just want to sleep, I am not sleeping well at night. Anytime I turn ove, I wake up and then I think about things. I dream about my husband being with another women. I think about me fighting with people. People that I have not even met. I hate the girls that he is talking to and I don't even know them. They know that Ryan is married and they don't care. I am beginning to jsut hate people. If I ever met any of the girls he is talking to, I know that I will probably get in a fight with them. I jsut have so much anger and hatred built up that I don't think I would be able to contain it. The weird thing is that I don't feel anger towards my husband and he is the one doing the things. I just have pain from him. I can't even write anymore, all the things in my mind are just jumbled up.