A week ago today we buried my grandmother.  She was my last one.  It feels weird thinking she's gone.  But she left not knowing anything about my husbands situation so that makes me happy.  And the funeral wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be.  I was able to leave our daughter at the inlaws and just told people that I didn't think it was appropriate to bring a 5 month old to a funeral.  They just assumed she was at home with Daddy.  
I keep a countdown on my phone.  Every time I look at it, it makes me sad.  There is still so much more time.  I know it's not the worst sentence compared to a lot of people's, but it was the worst that he could have received.  The judge we had for sentencing nickname is "maximum" so there was little hope that he would have received less.  But still when I think of how many days he's been gone, it's seems like it's gone by semi fast, so that's good.  And the other thing that makes me smile right now is my daughter has started to give people kisses, slobbery kisses.  I love it.