We miss them when something bad is going on, when our life is an emotional roller coaster and when we have great news. We miss them. Simple fact that we wish they were here to share in our joy and in our sadness. If just we could have one moment to talk to them. Would be able to get the whole message out or would be stuttering. I don't know how I could even imagine him standing in front of me. What i would say. But I do know even when I sit and talk to him now it just isn't the same because I don't have his feedback. I mean my husband was very outgoing, he talked, and talked, and he could fit in any social environment. Sometimes he didn't think before he talked. But it was the way I loved him. The reason I went on that first date was because he was talking to much and felt bad that he opened his mouth and inserted his foot. Harry and I are both talkers, put the two of us together and it was non stop conversation. In our early days of dating, we spent sundays, locked up in the one bedroom apartment talking talking, talking. On our first date we talked from the time we met til 4 am. I never had a conversation like that before. I knew we where special together. When we were choosing names for Matt, we thought of choosing the name Paul, because Paul would preach the gospel and we knew Matt would be a talker too. (Not that Harry thought he would be a missionary) Just that he would talk. But it did make Harry smile, when he heard Matt teaching his friends about the real meaning of Easter in our driveway at age 7. (He still did not want matt to go on the missions field) But i always say only GOd knows. And maybe his missionfield will right there in town. Well, I am going a different direction than I intended to. So back to missing our love ones. yes, we miss them. And yes we want them here with us. This really hit home with me last night. Sometimes it is so hard being both father and mother. I have to think what would my husband say. How would he handle this situation. I am the drama queen and sometimes over react. If you all don't know that by now. SO here is the scoop, we go online to check grades and Matt has his first D with only 4 days left in the marking period. Well I was not to happy. he has a zero in one of the projects. He says he turned in. I told him he had a day to work it out. But i was not happy. Benefits of technology and disadventage. When it comes to Matt's sports sometimes I am so into them that it scares people. Well tonight Matt will play football under the lights!!!!!!!!!!! His first game on the field at the high school. This game is for the high school coaches to see what is coming there way next year. So here I was thinking no way is he getting a chance to play. So last night I was giving him a pep talk. Telling him to stand next to the coach. If the coach sees your face you may get a chance to play. This was my husband's job football and dad were really involved. My husband and son would replay every game at home. The pros and the cons. If the game happened at 9 am Sat. They talked all about football from 11 am sat. Til Monday night, the same game over and over until I said we need to change the subject boys.One thing my husband did was he installed in my son that you are Best that you will succeed. You are an animal and your future is a full scholarship to a college(GATORS or Miami)  then to the pro's. I on the otherhand, tell him the reality side. But my son thinks he is the best and beat anybody at anything. Good attitude.The pep talk continued until he looked at me and said, "Mom coach said I am starting'" And my response was like great, don't let them forget your name, but forget their own. I just am so excited for him. And this is why I miss Harry today. I can expect he would be calling everyone today to tell them the news. He would be so excited. I wish He was here to share the first game under the lights.