I am writing again, because I just need to get it all out. I want to share with all of you, what is going on, in this little brain of mine. It is racing, with memories of my dear Harry. Memories, that make me smile, and some that even make me cry. I am just so excited about just having had him in my life.He lifted me up when I was so, so doubtful of what tomorrow was going to bring. The first of everything without him, was really tough. Reflecting on everything now. I think the hardest was Christmas, and his birthday. GOd really surrended me with his love, I know it is the only way I made it through the first. One major thing and I will probally repeat over and over again. "I use to depend on Harry for everything, even when I didn't realize it.But now God is retraining, me to depend on him, on everything, and at more deeper Walk.so how do i describe Harry. He was loving, caring, giving, stubborn, intelligent, selfish at times, set in his way, hated change, creative, mechanical, great with his hands, silly, young at heart, But most of all he was my husband. So, here it is a year later, and I still see his face in every room. The pain is not as strong as it  once was for me. Of course the lonliness is still there. But knowing he NO LONGER CRIES IN PAIN, is so very comforting to me. I am looking forward to see what God will do. How he is going to use this valley, in my life. I am sure it will knock my socks off. I learned the following things this year.1. It is ok to grieve2. It is ok to cry3. It is ok to tell others how you feel4. it is ok to ask for help5. It is ok to laugh, 6. Life will never be the same7. Turn to the Lord for help, put EVERYTHING AT HIS FEET, and leave it there.8. God will provide and answer prayer9. I am not crazy10. A new life but that will be ok,