Another day, alone, another day with out Harry. How will I ever stop feeling so alone in this world. I know God is in control. But I just want something better. Is the grass always greener. As I think back to time when he was here and in so much pain. Now he is no pain, so I should rejoice, his prayers are answered. But I am here alone. I look at my son, and I see my husband. How that was never there before. It makes me laugh and makes me cry. I want to share these changes with Harry. Never before where these traits visible to either of us. All of the sudden they are here. How did that happen??? I don't want to express that with my son because he is fighting for this independent thing right now. Which is a normal preteen thing. I can remember when I was going through that stage. The other day I was walking through the market and someone called out to me and said I looked just like mom. I laughed, because I am a lot like her. I miss her a lot, and wish she was here to share my thoughts and feelings with her. Had dinner with my dad this past weekend. Sometimes he is awesome, and other times he just doesn't think before he talks. He told me "He misses my mom everyday and not a day goes by he doesn't think about her. or the life they shared." Oh great I thought to myself, no matter where God takes me I will never loose this empty feeling I have with out my husband. Just what I needed to hear. Time is just way to short.