So, yesturday I was very sad and down. Yes it was because of my extreme doubt about giving up my condo (aka my security). Thinking about how he can walk away and have no responsibility towards us ( me and my son) and we lose the home we had ,and he walks away with profits he never had and responsibility of only himself.
But my husband sensed my pain and was very reassuring of his love and how we will be FOREVER. He also said he understood my apprehension and fear. It felt very good that he actually understood , instead of take it personally ,like he used to, and become angry about my reluctances. He even said how this is suppose to be an exciting time for both of us,not just him ,and he doesnt want to do this without my acceptance. So I appreciated that so much that I felt happier about stepping out to upgrade. I am still nervous as heck, but I feel better having a partner UNDERSTAND rather than feeling I have an enemy. I noticed my journal trends, up and down ,up and down. I hope that things stay more consistently good.