Lonely

I've been trying very hard lately to stay positive. I called a few friends, went to lunch with one. I've been trying to exercise and get out of the house. but no matter what I do I can't get over this feeling of just Pure sadness.  I want to cry all the time. I'm so lonely. I've started doing things by myself,  like going to the movie and the pool. It's awful. I can't enjoy anything anymore.  I don't know what to do except cry. When the kids were growing up I always had a full house. I never envisioned this. Of course I didn't consider that I would be growing old alone. All my friends have husband's to do things with.
  I think I'll go lay down. I'm about to start crying again. I've been shooting bottle rockets off by myself. It's depressing!